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| Title: The Tin Box Rating: PG-13 (all images are worksafe) Summary: Jack goes down in history. And he has the photos to prove it. Author's Notes: Thanks to Gypsy, Foxy, Amandr, Nick, Claire, Spider, C, and Thad for providing photos, inspiration, and encouragement (AND BETAS, JESUS). I know not all of these manips are perfect, but I learned a lot while doing them. If you click on each photo, there's a link to the same photo at my gallery, with commentary on my process and my thoughts. Some are more sublime than others. ( The Tin Box ) | |
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| Title: Writ In Water Rating: PG-13 Summary: "Time isn't an archive, with neat little files and labels. It's just this...heap of things that happened. You pull something off the bottom, you knock some things over. That's why we live with our messes." Notes: Written for the final round of writerinadrawer. Thanks to 51stcenturyfox for beta sparkles. Theme: Getting clean; added element, a board game. Word Count: Less than 4500 Score: 1 (+12, -11). Won the round and, thus, the game. Here lies one whose name was writ in water.-- Gravestone epitaph of John Keats ( Writ In Water ) | |
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| Title: The Harp Of My Country Survives Rating: PG Summary: Gwen catches Jack and Ianto in a private moment, long after both of them have left. Notes: Written for round 10 of writerinadrawer. Thanks to 51stcenturyfox for beta sparkles. Frankly I didn't think I had it in me to write this kind of story, this exploration of the grief Gwen must have experienced and the way she might recover Torchwood as a part of that process. But, well, here it is. Theme: Photograph (find or take a photo your character has in their possession); added element, a song title. Word Count: Less than 1500 Score: 10 (+11, -1). Won the round. ( The Harp Of My Country Survives ) | |
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| Title: We Have No Protocol For This Rating: PG-13 Summary: What, you thought bodyswap machines would be fun sex toys? Notes: Written for round 9 of writerinadrawer. Thanks to 51stcenturyfox for beta sparkles. I'd been writing really sort of dark fic, and I thought I'd do something light and bantery for a change. This resulted in my second ever negative score. Oops? :D Theme: Bodyswap; added element, a piece of candy. Word Count: Less than 1200 Score: -1 (+1, -2) ( We Have No Protocol For This ) | |
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| Title: Tuesday the 17th Rating: PG-13 Summary: Ianto and Jack begin to reach an understanding in the aftermath of Cyberwoman. Notes: Written for round 8 of writerinadrawer. Thanks to 51stcenturyfox for beta sparkles. Theme: Use a title from Psych, the TV show; added element, one fruit and one vegetable Word Count: Less than 1000 Score: 2 (+3, -1) ( Tuesday the 17th ) | |
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| Title: Four Uniforms Jack Harkness Wore (And One He Never Did) Rating: PG Summary: Jack has worn any number of uniforms, but some he won't wear. Notes: Written for round 7 of writerinadrawer. Thanks to 51stcenturyfox for beta sparkles. This story was especially popular among some of my friends, and I am still teased by Claire that nothing I write will ever compare to Uniforms. :D Theme: 4 + 1; added element, colours of the rainbow. This was also an optional round. Word Count: Less than 1000 ( Four Uniforms ) | |
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| This is the archival post for rounds 1-6 of the writerinadrawer challenge. With special thanks to: thefannishwaldo for running this and being a fantastic hardworking mod 51stcenturyfox for blowing BETA SPARKLES all over every entry And all who read and voted, both for your praise and for your criticism. Title: I Went To The Animal Fair Rating: G Summary: Torchwood contemplates the capture of an escaped zoo animal. Theme: Drabble; added element, zoo animal. Word Count: 100 Exactly Score: 12 (-1, +13). Won the round. ( I Went To The Animal Fair )Title: Show Me Your Schematics Rating: PG Summary: Jack bribes a young mechanic into helping him with a problem with his Spitfire. Notes: I regret, with this one, the low wordcount. I wanted to tell a much more complete story instead of what seems like just a scene; the idea was to show Jack introducing someone to the wonders of the universe, as an exploration of how long he has spent at this kind of thing. Theme: Favor. One of our characters needs a favor from someone; added element, a city foreign to your character. Word count: Limited To 400 Score: 3 (-1, +4). ( Show Me Your Schematics )Title: Keep Calm And Carry On Rating: PG Summary: The Torchwood archives are covered in signs, but at first Ianto doesn't understand why. Theme: Signage; added element, a hand gesture, sign or signal. Words: Limited to 500 Score: 5 (+5). Won the round. ( Keep Calm and Carry On )Title: I Know The Voices Dying Rating: PG-13 Summary: Jack decides a paradox might be a way to solve his little immortality problem, and at the moment he doesn't care who he takes with him. Notes: This is a little more disjointed than I would have liked; I wanted him to have more time to discuss paradoxes with Elisia, and I wanted his thought process to paint a more complete picture for the audience of a totally broken man, someone who has turned so far inwards that there's no discernable difference between him and a sociopath. I Know The Voices Dying is a line from TS Eliot's Prufrock. Theme: School and lessons; added element, a common school supply Words: Less than 500 Score: -2 (-4, +2) ( I Know The Voices Dying )Title: The Water's Fine Rating: PG-13 Summary: Ianto takes a leap of faith. Notes: I have to admit that I kind of stole the 'something on my face' line from a fic I'd been beta-reading, without meaning to. SORRY FOXY. Theme: Unexpected Side Effect; added element, advice from your mother Word Count: Less than 700. Score: 4 (-1, +5). Won the round. ( The Water's Fine )Title: In Loco Parentis Rating: PG Summary: Jack is retconned back to childhood, and Ianto does what he has to in order to fix it. Notes: This was the subject of some hot comment action. The biggest problem people had with it was the idea that Retcon Doesn't Work That Way, but my more pressing concern was how flat it was. The wordcount bit me on the ass again in this; I wanted to go into much more detail about Jack's feelings and reactions, and about the team reacting to Ianto's initiative-taking. C'est la vie. Theme: Amnesia; added element, a television show. Word Count: Less than 700 Score: 3 (-7, +10) ( In Loco Parentis ) | |
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| Title: The Ten Commandments Don't Apply To Angels Rating: PG-13 (language) Fandom: Supernatural (Spoilers through the premiere of S5) Summary: Dean keeps insisting Castiel do things that humans do; sometimes Castiel is grateful for this, and sometimes...not so much. Mild Dean/Castiel. Notes: BETA CREDIT to 51stcenturyfox and girlpearl, who rock. I suppose this is something of an AU. It'll probably be jossed by Thursday anyway. But it was fun to examine the concept of how an angel might cope with human life. Also, yes, I know the commandments are out of order. Cope. sadcypress has podficc'd "The Ten Commandments Don't Apply To Angels", and you can find the recording for download here. It's a great emotive reading and the audio is very clear, so I hope you enjoy it and let her know how she did! ( The Ten Commandments Don't Apply to Angels ) | |
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| Title: Protective Custody Fandom: Southland (Spoilers for S1) Rating: PG-13 (profanity) Summary: Fuck you, Cooper likes saving people. Notes: BETA CREDIT to 51stcenturyfox. ( Protective Custody ) | |
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| I've been meaning to go back to Laocoon's Children for a long time. I've talked about my hesitation and the reasons for it here (spoiler warnings for Torchwood S3, btw), and I decided finally, in the end, it's too much. There's too much to write, and I want to focus on my own original writing now. But I've felt guilty leaving it unfinished, so I wanted to post my notes. Turns out I had a lot more notes than I expected. I even had scenes to share. I ended up having to separate it into two posts; there's a link at the bottom of this one to the second half.I spent most of today collating them and assembling them, and I may do Legion of Ghosts this weekend. Needless to say there are spoilers for the Harry Potter books in both sections. This is a summary of what I had been planning to write, to finish this project. Some of it is a bit vague, and some of it has been adjusted to take in the last two books, which were published after this plotting was finished. I hope you enjoy it; I present it both with pride for what it is, and with my apologies that it isn't all it could be. ( The River House )And onwards we go... ( Book Three ) | |
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| This is the second half of a post about Laocoon's Children, the first half of which is here, along with the explanation for it. ( Books Four, Five, And Six )And that's the end. Thanks for reading, everyone, and I am sorry I can't make this live for you. You have been amazing. | |
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| Title: On The Run From The Lunar Mafia Rating: PG-13 (language) Summary: Gareth David-Lloyd's quiet evening is interrupted by time travel. And robots. Notes: This is without a doubt the most ridiculous thing I have ever written. I was actually going to make it a semi-serious piece, and then...this came out. I don't even know, you guys. BLAME: hija_paloma is to blame for this, as illustrated here. 51stcenturyfox beta'd this hard. cruentum convinced me to post it. THEY ARE BAD PEOPLE. ( On The Run From The Lunar Mafia ) | |
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| Title: The Harkness Variations Rating: PG-13 (violence, innuendo) Summary: Ten ways Jack's life could have been different -- some better, some worse, for him and for others. Warnings: Character death. #10 has very, very mild CoE spoilers (translation: Not THAT character). BETA CREDIT JESUS: 51stcenturyfox beta'd the hell out of this. ( The Harkness Variations ) | |
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| Spoilers: Children of Earth, Day One Rating: Uh. Um. Strong PG-13? Ianto/Gwen/Jack. Summary: Surely, given that Ianto had made his own peace with Jack and Gwen's bizarre sexless love affair, they had known they were having it. Notes: BETA CREDIT!! 51stcenturyfox beta'd this leik whoa for me. ( Price ) | |
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| Big Bang is up! For those just joining us, TARDIS Big Bang is a fic-and-art festival where writers submit a fanfic of 20k words or more, and then artists illustrate or vid the fic. You can find a more complete linkslist over at Copperbadge, but if you just want to find my fic and art they are located here: Title: Sing Morning Out Of NightFandom: Torchwood, New Who, Sarah Jane Adventures Rating: PG-13 (mostly for dark themes; no explicit sex) Summary: A strange deck of Tarot cards, a dying TARDIS, and UNIT's invasion of a coastal Welsh village lead Torchwood to investigate the disappearance of the Doctor, with some help from Sarah Jane and Luke Smith. This is a new incarnation of the Doctor, however, and none of them are prepared for what they find as they unravel the mystery.TARDIS Tarot card by caersmaneBook Cover by mad_jaksBack Cover by mizz_destiny. (slightly spoilery, this one) laurab1 also did two images not linked formally from Big Bang: Jack with the TARDIS Laughing Doctor FourteenEnjoy! | |
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| Title: I Make No Promises As To Historical Veracity Rating: PG Summary: Ianto copes by inventing the coffee machine. Gwen copes by crossdressing. Shortfic. Notes: Written in response to rm posting a steampunky coffeemaker and demanding a Torchwood steampunk AU. Which is not really AU so much as an unexplored branch, really. The original comment is on that post, this is the expanded and enhanced version. ( What are you doing? ) | |
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| Title: Interrogation Rating: Light R Summary: After Jack returns and John Hart departs, Ianto and Owen both get to confront Jack about his immortality in their own way. (Jack/Ianto) Notes: Something that occurred to me recently was that none of the Torchwood agents except Gwen really had the opportunity to process Jack's immortality when they found out about it, and they would naturally have questions when he returned. Thanks to mcgonagalls_cat for betaz! ( Interrogation ) | |
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| Title: Good Boy Rating: R for violence (no sex) Summary: Tony needs Gibbs. Gibbs has his uses for Tony, too. This is dark and pretty gristly. Author's Notes: Set basically in the same universe as the NCIS/Dexter crossover. I'm...quite disturbed that this came out of my head, in fact. ( Snapshot. ) | |
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| Title: I Were The Heavens Rating: PG for language Summary: A sixteen-year-old boy from Boeshane is going to win the war. The Time Agency has a vested interest in children like him -- and so does the Admiral of the Fleet. ( I Were The Heavens ) | |
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| Summary: The Doctor joins some Kings of Orient following a star, helps a quartet of sociologists, gets thrown in prison, meets shepherds (ditto: talking sheep), finds a baby in a stable, uses Christmas carols for nefarious ends, and learns The True Meaning Of Camel. Notes: I can't take credit for the turtles; it references an urban-legendy anecdote, by way of Stephen Fry on Quite Interesting. Thanks to hija_paloma for beta-reading. ( The Gift of the Mad Guy ) | |
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| Title: Wonders Never Cease Rating: R for safety. TEH SEX OMG. Summary: Kissing the Doctor isn't like kissing other people. Coda to 3.02, The Shakespeare Code. Doctor/Will Shakespeare. He knows how little room there is in there For crude and futile animosities And how much for the joy of being whole, And how much for long sorrow and old pain. -- Edwin Arlington Robinson, "Ben Jonson Entertains A Man From Stratford" ( William was working. ) | |
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| Title: Bar TARDIS Rating: G Summary: When Rose starts feeling a little too much kinship for the banana tree in the kitchen, the Doctor takes her for a quiet drink. A really quiet drink. First posted 4.7.07( Bar TARDIS ) | |
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| Title: The Impressionist Mechanism Rating: PG Fandom: Harry Potter (PoA film specific) Summary: What possesses a relatively sensible grown man to buy spine candles for a children's classroom? Notes: First posted in Copperbadge and never archived here, I found it when resurrecting Copperbadge and thought I would repost. I believe it was written for a fic contest on FictionAlley, having to do with "visuals from the PoA film" which had just come out. First posted 6.14.2004.( The Impressionist Mechanism ) | |
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| Title: 88 Lines About 44 Fandoms Rating: PG? How do I even rate this? Summary: A filk of 88 Lines About 44 Women by The Nails. Author's Notes: My brain. My brain, you guys. Author's Notes a year and a half later: This is embarrassing. I can't believe I'm posting it. AND YET I AM. One more thing found post-Hack and needing to be archived. First posted: 3.1.07( 88 Lines About 44 Fandoms ) | |
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| Two short fics I found in my post-Hack excavations; thought I'd stash them here. Title: What's Good For Vorenus Fandom: Rome Rating: PG-13 Summary: Titus Pullo wants what's good for his Centurion. (Pullo/Vorenus) First posted 11.14.2005( Titus Pullo is not as stupid as he looks... )Title: I'm Having A Vision Fandom: The Dead Zone Rating: PG-13 Summary: Bruce knew he was in trouble when Sara mistook his date for Johnny. (Bruce->Johnny) ( Bruce knows Johnny better than anyone... ) | |
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| Title: Wolves at the Door Genre: Lord Peter/Harry Potter crossover of sorts. Summary: When Auror Investigator Potter's hands are legally tied in the case of an Oxford professor accused of murder, the elegant and inquisitive Draco Malfoy is asked to investigate. Towing his faithful manservant Weasley along behind him, he leaves his comfortable flat in Sosh Alley to venture into the wilds of academia and determine whether Professor Lupin really is capable of murder during the full moon. Notes: "In a way, I blame blythely for this, because it's the sort of idea she would usually come up with." That was the original note that came attached to this fic, which was never archived at Storyteller but was recovered in my post-Hack excavations. It's not complete, nor will it be completed; it's just a vignette, meant to entertain. Enjoy :) First posted 4.20.2005( Wolves at the Door ) | |
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| Title: Compromise Rating: PG Characters: Team; mild Jack/Ianto Summary: After the Beacons, Ianto's inner censor is offline and Jack refuses to go home. German expressionism ensues. ( Compromise ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Summary: Ianto Jones woke up in a bed that wasn't his, in a flat that wasn't his, with a headache he definitely didn't remember deserving. Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! Chapter Seven( Chapter Eight ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Summary: A scholar who carries a gun. Yes, I understand. It's very hard to be both. To want to know, and to know that you can't know, that sometimes the cost of knowing is too high. Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! Chapter Six( Chapter Seven ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Summary: This is the JOKE chapter that I used in a Hallowe'en prank. It is NOT THE REAL CHAPTER SEVEN. Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! Chapter Six( Chapter Seven ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Summary: "Water pistols," Ianto observed. "We're going to save the world using water pistols." Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! Chapter Five( Chapter Six ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Summary: Well, there was the comforting thought that perhaps he hadn't been mad before and was now going mad, because Ianto Jones had always been good at taking two bad situations and combining them. Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! Chapter Four( Chapter Five ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Summary: "And I miss it so fucking much," Jack said brokenly. "And I have for so long -- " Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! ( Chapter Three ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Summary: There are things you and Jack don't talk about, but he'd probably really like it if you helped him on with his coat. It's something you used to do. Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! Chapter One ( Chapter Two ) | |
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| Title: The Theory of Two Centres Pairings: Canon. Set post-S2. Rating: R for eventual sex; also violence. Summary: Ianto Jones woke up in a bed that wasn't his, in a flat that wasn't his, wearing clothing that definitely wasn't his. Notes: Thanks to la_rainette, adina_atl, and spiderine for advice on fighting, firearms, italics, titles, eggs, and grammar. All are important! ( Chapter One ) | |
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| Title: Not What You're Thinking Summary: Gwen can't help but ask. Ianto can't quite resist telling. Rating: PG-13 Ships/Characters: Jack/Ianto, Gwen, Tosh. Notes: Coming up with this made me feel like a god damned genius. I love a tidy fanfic. *dusts hands* ( Not What You're Thinking ) | |
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| Title: It Was Not Death, For I Stood Up Rating: PG Summary: In the months leading up to Suzie's suicide, Ianto comes under her wing and learns from her example. Author's notes: Originally these scenes were part of a larger fic, where they served as interludes and flashbacks, but as they had nothing, ever, to do with the rest of the fic I culled them out and reworked them into something standalone. This owes much to Lady Paperclip's "Acquaint Me With Your Fuck-Ups", in which she suggested that Ianto and Suzie probably had a pretty fascinating relationship dynamic going on. ( It Was Not Death, For I Stood Up ) | |
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| Title: The Quiet Room Rating: R Couplings: (please to note that not all of these are ships) Gwen/Owen, Ianto/Tosh, Ianto/Jack, Ianto/Gwen/Jack Summary: "Inside this room, no one talks," Ianto said, his voice carefully neutral. "It isn't allowed. What goes on here stays here and, outside of it, never happened. Other than that there are no rules, in a manner of speaking." Author's Notes: This was written in response to exuberantself, who said here: Personally, I "believe" that there is a reasonably large room in the back end of the Hub where there is nothing but a lamp and a very nice bed. Inside the room, no one speaks and there are no consequences. At the end of a particularly trying day, the members of Torchwood Cardiff, in whole or part, go to it. This does not follow the details of the rest precisely, but does chase the spirit of the thing. ( The Quiet Room ) | |
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| Another fic that never made it into the archives, but OMG I am so glad I found this one, I really like it.
Drabble: Calm Acceptance. First Posted 7.24.2003.
The History Channel tells us that on February 8, 1587, Mary Queen of Scots was beheaded for treason. Her son, King James VI of Scotland, calmly accepted his mother's execution.
"Jamie, I'm going to kill your mother for treason," said Elizabeth.
James, King of Scotland, looked thoughtful.
"Can I have her room?" he asked. | |
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| I don't think this was ever posted here -- I just rediscovered it post-hack. Enjoy. :) Title: The Book We'll Never See Summary: JK Rowling, Terry Pratchett, and Neil Gaiman have a quiet drink down the pub. First posted 7.23.2003; just after OotP came out.( The Book We'll Never See ) | |
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| Title: The Stainless Steel Rat Lives Forever Authors: copperbadge and madripoor_roseFandoms: Torchwood and the Stainless Steel Rat series of novels. Rating: PG-13 Summary: It was a quiet Tuesday afternoon when a beautiful, heavily armed woman fell through the Rift, and Jack swore in Esperanto and tried to hide under his desk.( The Stainless Steel Rat Lives Forever ) | |
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| Title: Care And Feeding Pairing: Jack/OMC, Jack/Ianto Rating: PG Spoilers: None, really. Notes: This is a sort of paradox; it's a chronological prequel to Nice Coat, by adina_atl, but was written second. Nice Coat is a genius of a fic and you should definitely read it first; the ideas laid out in this fic are all Adina's, I just nicked them to play around with. ( Care And Feeding ) | |
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